Retreat is over. When there is no Newbie to make your waffles and serve you, you know you are back to the real world. I even had to make my own coffee today. I wanna go back!
Speaking of Newbies…. you need to meet them!
Here are the Newbies! Tracie, Linda & Debbi. Don’t let the feathers fool you. It apparently was Newbie Rebellion Retreat. They were supposed to entertain us. The best we could get was a few pics of them pretending to entertain us.
And don’t forget Jules! She left early to get out of entertaining us. And I had to crop her out of a group picture to even have a picture of her. We might have to declare “Newbie Overs” and make them all be newbies again at the next retreat. But we’ll never remember, so I think they are safe. Oh, the advantages of having an over 50 crowd!
More pretend entertainment for the camera. Clever newbies is what they were.
One more. Just because I had the pictures and wanted to use them. Not because they did anything fabulous. To entertain us as they were instructed. Silly Newbies!
Here are the instructions they were given. In their defense, they did make a newbie hat. And they did make nametags for everyone. Although foamboard with my name written on it in lime green does not make a keepsake for me that I want to “treasure forever.” We made them decorate them further later on.
Look at the things they were given to work with! You’d think they were just at retreat to sew or something. Sheesh! Plus they had feathers and green wigs and masks. They could have really gone wild. But they just wanted to sew. And they rebelled. LaLa wouldn’t have let them get away with it. She’d have put her foot down. We’ll have to make sure LaLa is at the next retreat. She always whips the Newbies into shape.
When they refused to wear the feathers, their sewing machines got to wear them.
But Tracie just sewed around them. She was on a mission. To complete 427 New York Beauty quilt blocks. And she would not be deterred.
Newbie Linda sat on a very large whoopee cushion when she sewed. She entertained us evey time she sat down. Not. It was just some sort of ergonomic thing. You apparently have to balance to stay on? I didn’t sit on it nor did I figure it out. But it made Linda very happy. At least she was always smiling.
The Newbies (minus Jules) did entertain us at lunch on the last day. Only because we made them. We ganged up on them and made them tell us all about themselves. Only because they were outnumbered 6 to 1. Of course I only remember that one of them rode a horse in her wedding and didn’t do a bungie jump. Or was it the other way around? One of them got married when she was 16 and had 10 kids. Or maybe that was the part we made up about her? She also said something about singing in a country rock band and riding motorcycles before she ever drove a car. And we believed every word.
You see, we sort of played that “two truths and a lie” game. Only now I can’t separate the truths from the lies. I do remember that one Newbie had only truths and no lies. Apparently she is incapable of lying. However she was a bit deceptive. She told us she was born in London. Now you’d assume London, England if someone told you that, wouldn’t you? But you’d be very wrong. She was born in London, Kentucky. Quite a bit different than London, England. Clever, Newbie. Very clever.
So the jury is still out on whether they get to be veterans at the next retreat or they have to redo their Newbie stint. But I suppose we’ll give them a break. Tracie did make coffee every time we asked. And we asked a lot. And Linda jumped right up and brought me chips when I ran out of chips before I ran out of salsa one day. (Don’t you hate it when that happens?) So I didn’t have to leave my sewing machine. Not that my sewing machine was doing anything. I was too busy socializing to do much sewing.
So this retreat will be forever known as “Newbie Rebellion” Retreat. And they rebelled quite well and got away with it. Now they can move on to be veterans and terrorize the Newbies at the next retreat in April. I’m already counting the days. But I’m still trying to figure out what was in that envelope containing the “newbie code.”
And I want to know where my waffle is.
Still recovering from all the fun,